Kate Moss Takes a Trip 'Downtown'

Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Moss Returns to Britain to Face Police

After months of ducking British authorities, Kate Moss returned to the UK and was interviewed by British police in relation to the now infamous video and photos of her snorting cocaine.

In TV crime show vernacular, she went 'downtown to talk about it,' but hasn't yet been charged with any crimes. I don't know what she could possibly say for herself: they have video of her doing it. What's she going to do, claim it was baking soda?

Don't be surprised if she winds up facing charges after all this...It would be pretty hard for the British justice system to justify busting the average junkie on the street and letting her go after the whole world watches her snorting coke on video right under their noses.

Lindsay Lohan Mysteriously Cuts Herself

Monday, January 30, 2006

Lohan gets stitched up after teacup accident

Say what? Are we seriously supposed to believe that Lindsay Lohan cut herself with a teacup so badly that she required 10 stitches? C'mon, guys...

While it's not nearly as serious an incident as Joaquin Phoenix, the cover story is just as unbelievable as "his brakes went out."

First, have you ever broken a ceramic teacup? It's not like they break into razor shards capable of cutting in an instant. They break into pieces that are relatively innocuous unless you're trying to use them to attack someone. Second, 10 stitches from a teacup? 10 stitches is almost an inch long gash. That's an awfully hefty cut from any shard of ceramics.

I understand that what really happened to her is probably embarrassing: odds are she was doing something she shouldn't have been doing and managed to injure herself in the process. What gets me is the incredible stupidity they expect people to swallow when they try to cover it up.

Listen up PR People, if your client does something stupid and gets hurt, take five minutes of thought and pay us the respect of coming up with something at least halfway believable...Obviously coming up with stories off the top of your heads is not your strong suit...

Jessica Alba #1 Girlfriend

Jessica Alba dubbed ideal girlfriend

An online poll for which celebrity would make the best long-term girlfriend, Jessica Alba came out on top - ahead of Sienna Miller and Angelina Jolie.

I can buy into Jessica Alba winning the poll as she seems one of the most down-to-earth of today's starlets, but I can't see either Sienna Miller or Angelina Jolie as "long-term girlfriend" material. Although Sienna was martyred in the press because of Jude Law's affair, much less well publicized was her own affair with Daniel Craig. So she's not exactly the "trust her with your best friend" kind of girl.

And Angelina? Oh Angelina...She has a history of hooking up with her male co-stars (Johnny Miller from Hackers, Billy Bob Thornton from Pushing Tin, and Brad Pitt from Mr. & Mrs. Smith), so unless she was planning on giving up movie-making that's not really such a smart long-term option either.

Some of the rest of the Top 10 are such luminaries as Adriana Lima, Charlize Theron, Jessica Biel, Natalie Portman, and Eva Longoria.

Surprise, surprise....Britney Spears didn't make the list...

Olympics To Take Big Chance on Whitney Houston

Sunday, January 29, 2006

Singers on fast track for exposure at Olympics

Whitney Houston is being given a chance to perform during the upcoming Winter Olympics. My question is why?

Over the last decade her behavior has become increasingly erratic due to an unacknowledged drug problem. I haven't seen or heard anything to indicate that she's kicked that problem to the curb, so why would she be given the chance to blow up on an international stage during one of the biggest events in the world?

I'm almost hoping for an absolute debacle that night to teach the Olympics an important lesson about what happens when you count on drug addicts....

Ashton Kutcher To Take Restaurant Plunge

Saturday, January 28, 2006

Ashton Kutcher among celebrities planning Reno restaurant

Ashton Kutcher is looking to invest in a restaurant in Reno, Nevada. I guess he hasn't been paying attention to other ill-fated restaurant celebrity-backed ventures like Planet Hollywood, and Britney Spears' NYLA.

I'm not hoping for him to fail, but given that the project isn't exactly attracting "A-list" investors, I can't believe that the prospects for the restaurant's future are bright. The truth is that he wouldn't have even been offered an opportunity to invest in it if more famous or better-heeled investors were willing to put their money down.

Good luck, Ashton....you're going to need it...

Joaquin Phoenix Nearly Kills Himself

Friday, January 27, 2006

Joaquin Walks Away from Car Wreck

The official story is that his brakes went out and his car flipped over. Yeah right. First, there's no way his car is so incredibly badly maintained that his brakes went out. I've driven some cars that have been badly maintained, and the brakes never "went out."

Second, even if your brakes go out it doesn't cause your car to flip. It might cause you to crash your car because you can't take a curve, but it's not going to flip your car.

None of this story is believable in the least. Whatever happened, it wasn't the fault of his vehicle or his brakes: he screwed up behind the wheel. Whether he was sober and speeding or under the influence of something and lost control or some combination thereof, I have no doubt that it was his own fault that he flipped his vehicle. Blaming it on the brakes is simply a way to avoid the bad publicity he would otherwise suffer.

He's lucky to have lived through his recklessness. That's all I have to say about that.

Meg Ryan Jumps on Foreign Adoption Bandwagon

Thursday, January 26, 2006

Meg Ryan adopts baby girl from China

Other than the positive publicity Angelina Jolie received for doing it, I'm not sure why it's all of a sudden the "in" thing to do. Now Meg Ryan is jumping on the bandwagon by adopting a little girl from China.

Why foreign babies? Not that I have something particularly against foreign children, but there are thousands - if not millions - of American children waiting to be adopted. You mean to tell me that there wasn't a single baby here in the United States that was available? Adoption services are constantly crying out that they need adoptive parents - especially for minority babies.

China isn't a country incapable of caring for its children, so that isn't the reason. Could it be just that by going overseas, celebrities like Meg Ryan can instantly get their "baby fix" instead of going through the process here instead? My guess is that these are impulse decisions rather than life-long dreams, and that celebrities aren't willing to wait for satisfaction. So they hop on a plane, pay a local adoption agency a load of cash, and presto! they have a baby.

I'm not against Meg Ryan adopting in general; in fact, I congratulate her on the addition to the family. I just have to wonder how much of it was just so she wouldn't miss out on the latest Hollywood fad....

Pamela Anderson Plea Falls on Deaf Ears

Governor to Pamela: Cluck Off!

This sort of activism always gives me a laugh. Pamela Anderson, in a very earnest and "I'm horrified" kind of way, wrote a letter to the governor of Kentucky telling him to remove the bust of KFC founder Col. Sanders from the Kentucky State Capitol. To which, of course, the governor responded with a very polite "Get lost, birdbrain."

What these PETA folks don't seem to get is writing half-baked letters about a bust of Col. Sanders or splashing paint on people wearing fur coats, etc. just makes their entire cause a laughing matter. They may be tackling a worthy cause, but the way they go about doing it is ridiculous. It reminds me of high school cheerleaders getting together at lunch to decide how they're going to "get" the girl who dissed them. It's juvenile, and it reduces them to parody.

Sorry Pam, this is one bust you can't touch....

Ambassador Nicole Kidman

Wednesday, January 25, 2006

UN names Nicole Kidman as goodwill ambassador

Nicole Kidman is joining Angelina Jolie in the unofficial employ of the U.N. as a goodwill ambassador.

While Angelina Jolie is goodwill ambassador for children, Nicole's cause is being a symbolic representative of the United Nations Development Fund for Women whose goal is advancing women's rights and gender equality.

This is the kind of advocacy that I support for celebrities: it's not a role where they have to pretend to greater knowledge than they actually possess, they're lending their celebrity to a cause they believe in. If Nicole or Angelina does some good on behalf of their causes, they deserve big pats on the back for doing some worthwhile with the fame they have received.

Kate Moss Cashes In

Supermodel Kate Moss to pen autobiography

Talk about turning lemons into lemonade...This is one of the major perks of being a celebrity: no matter how bad your conduct, no matter under what circumstances, you can always cash in on it...

So Kate Moss is going to cash in on her noteriety by writing a "tell-all" which, of course, isn't going to tell much of anything that we don't already know. The reality is that she's a drug addict who, despite being busted publicly more than once, still won't give up the drugs...do we really need to know much more than that?

Ozzy Osbourne Is a Sad Man

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

Ozzy: Xmas shopping would drive me to drink

If nothing else illustrates what a pathetic person Ozzy Osbourne is, this article surely does.

He has a wife he supposedly deeply loves, two kids - at least one of which he claims to be very proud of, fame, tons of money, and still he can't stand Christmas because "everyone is pi**ed." How dysfunctional do you have to be not to be happy with that kind of setup?

Sad, Ozzy...sad...

E Sends Groper to the Red Carpet

Monday, January 23, 2006

How Long Till This Guy Gets Sued?

If you're groping breasts without the express permission of the gropee, isn't that called "sexual assault" and punishable by some time behind bars? Is homosexuality now suddenly a "get out of jail free" card for criminal behavior?

Scarlett Johansson and Teri Hatcher were amongst the celebs who were publicly groped by this guy and not only is the network not sorry, they think it's great TV!

50 Cent May Have to Give Back a Few Cents

Sunday, January 22, 2006

50 Cent sued for copyright infringement

It looks like there's a pretty good chance that 50 Cent may have to fork over a few dollars for misappropriating some music.

Unlike many frivolous suits where some guy sitting in his basement claims to have written some lyrics or song snippet that suddenly became famous, the music in question was published in 1994 by 2 Live Crew and the similarities are unquestionable.

Have to keep a watch on this because not only would it cost 50 more than a few bucks but it would be a big hit to his credibility as well...

Angelina Jolie Changes Children's Names

Thursday, January 19, 2006

Judge says Jolie's children can take Pitt's name

It's officially official now. Angelina Jolie has legally changed her children's last name from "Jolie" to "Jolie-Pitt." So now they have mouthful of names Zahara Marley Jolie-Pitt and Maddox Chivan Jolie-Pitt. That's a whole lotta name for little kids with big implications for their future with Brad Pitt as their father.

Usually this is something that waits until after the parents actually get married, but then nothing about the relationship between Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt has been "normal," so why should this be any different?

Britney Spears Finds Religion

Wednesday, January 18, 2006

Oops, Spears switched religions again

Is Kaballah no more? Has Britney Spears decided to be a Hindu now?

I think the reality is that, like many people that age, she's trying to find a belief system that works for her. She's done a lot of things for which she can rightly be criticized, but I really don't think this is one of them.

I hope she finds something - whether its Hinduism or just a place inside her head - that gives her some inner peace because she really seems like that's the one thing she's most in need of....

Eminem Takes Her Back

Monday, January 16, 2006

Rapper Eminem and ex-wife remarry

After making a fortune trashing his ex-wife to the world, Eminem has remarried her.

I've yet to hear him say he was wrong for fantasizing about her death or saying all the horrible things he did about her, but I guess marrying into millions has a way of getting a woman to forget that you embarassed her in front of the whole world, huh?

Given how things have turned out, it seems that getting clean has cleared up his perception of their marriage, and it turns out she must not be so bad after all. Most likely it was his abuse of sleeping pills that brought turbulence to their first marriage, and instead of taking responsibility for his own problems he demonized her instead.

I hope for her sake that he's kicked the habit because otherwise she's probably going to find herself the subject of some future song when she decides, once again, that she's had enough...

Lindsay Lohan Denies Bulimia, Admits Drug Use

Tuesday, January 10, 2006

Lindsay Lohan "appalled" by Vanity Fair article

It's getting to be all Lindsay Lohan all the time it seems this week...

According to Lindsay Lohan, she never admitted to bulimia. Unfortunately for her, Vanity Fair says it has every word on tape.

Given her sudden and otherwise unexplained weight drop, I have to say that Lindsay's credibility on the subject isn't exactly impeccable. I'm going to have to go with the reporter from Vanity Fair....

Lindsay Lohan Hooks Up With Leo

Lindsay Lohan Romantically Involved With Leonardo DiCaprio

Leonardo DiCaprio, who has made a habit out of dating pretty much every attractive starlet in the last decade can now add Lindsay Lohan to the list.

It was only a matter of time before the hard-partying Lindsay Lohan made her way to King of Hard-Partying Leo who has practically ruled the Hollywood nightclub scene for years.

Whether you're dying to get with Leo or Lindsay not to worry, if past is prologue then this is not exactly meant to last...It also doesn't bode well for Lindsay's professed efforts to clean up her act: if you're going to straighten out your life, Leonardo DiCaprio isn't exactly the first person on your list of people to help you do that.

Hilary Swank Says Enough's Enough

Monday, January 09, 2006

Hilary Swank, Chad Lowe separate

Hilary Swank has made a career out taking on "boy" roles. Chad Lowe has made...umm...Well, he's Hilary Swank's husband though his personality and demeanor have always made him seem more feminine. So the match seemed to be made in heaven. She was the man, and he was the woman: but alas, after a Hollywood forever they're separating.

After yet another critically acclaimed role while he did pretty much nothing...again, how much time was it going to take before she decided that she needs someone more masculine?

Time's up, Chad...

Britney Spears On Her Way Back

Saturday, January 07, 2006

Britney Spears hits Vegas, baby!

Britney Spears is getting back into shape after giving birth to son Preson. There's no word yet on when, where, or how; but it's a safe bet that we haven't heard the last from Britney Spears.

She appears to patterning her life and career after her idol Madonna - taking a break between babies to release an album, do some publicity, rinse and repeat...

Trouble for Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes?

Thursday, January 05, 2006

Is wedding off for Cruise and Holmes?

Reportedly things didn't go so well over the holidays for Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes and that may wind up meaning long-term trouble for the couple.

I can hardly blame her folks for being upset about the whole thing after the spectacle Cruise has made of himself over the past year. It's one thing to be in love with a younger woman, but it's another thing to be so over the top weird about it.

I don't know what Holmes' relationship with her parents is like, but it must be fairly close for them to have planned to spend the holidays together. Coupled with reports about both Tom and Katie cooling off on marriage plans it may well be that Katie's schoolgirl crush has finally met up with reality....

Asthma Not Lindsay Lohan's Only Problem

Wednesday, January 04, 2006

Lindsay Lohan battles bulimia and asthma

Contrary to all her previous denials, Lindsay Lohan has indeed been suffering from an eating disorder: bulimia. The article describes "bulimic episodes," but the reality is that there is no such thing: Either you are bulimic or you aren't - you don't have episodes.

She's also admitting to "some drug use" which they speculate means cocaine. Given her father's problems with addiction and the tendency for that sort of thing to run in a family, Lindsay started off at a higher risk for addiction than the average person with a non-addicted parent as it is.

Hopefully she can get herself straightened out because she has too much talent to throw it all away with these self-destructive behaviors...

Is Angelina Jolie Having One of Her Own?

Is Angelina Jolie expecting?

It's official. We've now joined the speculators wondering if Angelina Jolie isn't expecting her first baby. The number of rumors regarding her clothes and needed refittings have reached the point that it would be more surprising to find out that she wasn't expecting than to find out that she is.

The article continues with speculation that she may be planning to make her relationship with Brad Pitt more permanent based on the time she allows him to spend with adopted son Maddox.

For two people who won't even admit they're seeing each other, it does seem that there's a lot going on, doncha think?

Asthma Hospitalizes Lindsay Lohan

Lindsay Lohan hospitalized after asthma attack, publicist says

According to the article, Lindsay Lohan is OK and resting comfortably after being admitted to the hospital Monday night. Somehow, given her history, I can't help but wonder if there isn't more to the story somehow....

Jessica Simpson Moves On

Monday, January 02, 2006

Jessica Moves In, Nick Moves On

Not wasting any more time, Jessica Simpson has bought herself a brand new $3 million house. She's asked that the courts deny Nick Lachey any alimony, so with all the extra cash she'll save by not having to support him any more she should have no problem making the payments.

Nick is casting about for ways to support himself now that he's been thrown off the Jessica Simpson money train. He's got an album coming out next year, and he's working on several TV projects. It remains to be seen how much demand there will be for him now that there's no connection to her. He better hope he finds a good PR team or the next TV project we'll see him on will be "The Surreal Life."